Embracing the Self-Love Expedition: From Broken to Blessed on a Survivor's Journey

Have you ever stood before a mirror, questioning the reflection staring back at you? This episode embarks on an intimate exposé of the Self-Love Expedition, a transformative journey I, Michelle Hall, have meticulously crafted for women who've weathered the storm of childhood sexual abuse. As your guide from Broken to Blessed, I extend an invitation to rediscover the essence of self-love—a force that's neither self-centered nor superficial, but a profound understanding and appreciation of one's worth and potential.

Within this heartfelt dialogue, we navigate the nuances of self-respect and the importance of nurturing one's mental and physical health.  You'll explore the transformative power of loving oneself with humility and grace, and how this internal healing light becomes the beacon by which we learn to love others. This episode isn't just a conversation; it's a call to action for every survivor to embrace their worth and embark on a path lined with empowerment, encouragement, and inspiration.

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Transcript

Michelle Hall: 0:01

What would you say if I asked if you loved yourself as a survivor of CSA? That could be a tricky question. It could be yes, of course I love myself. Or it could be no, I am not worthy of love, even for myself. I understand, because CSA can do significant damage to your self-esteem and self-worth, which could significantly impact your answer to this question. I want to challenge you to think about the love that you have for yourself. Is it a deep and abiding love that nurtures you and take care of you and help you to be the best version of yourself, for yourself and for those around you? Or is it a superficial love you know, like the bare minimum? Today I'm talking about my brand new personal development program specifically for women survivors of childhood sexual abuse, and how it can help you love yourself more than you ever thought possible. Let's get into it.

Michelle Hall: 1:12

Hi, I'm Michelle Hall, a Christian Life Coach and the host of Broken to Blessed, a podcast designed for women survivors of childhood sexual abuse, where the goal is to empower, encourage and inspire women survivors who are on their healing journey to keep on going. Healing is possible. I know that to be true because I am also a survivor and I've done it and I'm here to help you do the same. Hello, esteemed ones, I have been talking about launching this new personal development program for the last several weeks and I am happy to say that it is ready to go and ready for enrollment. The name of the program is the self-love expedition and I'm going to tell you all about it.

Michelle Hall: 2:03

But before I get into the details, let's talk about what self-love is and is not. Self-love is having an appreciation and respect for yourself. It includes taking care of your physical and mental health. It is about taking time to nourish yourself and treat yourself with the love and respect that you deserve. It means that you accept yourself fully and that you treat yourself with respect and that you nurture your growth and well-being. Self-love encompasses many things, including self-care, self-discovery, self-worth, self-esteem and self-compassion. Now, that's a lot of self-stuff, but that is where it all begins, right, it begins with you. Self-love does not mean that you put yourself on a pedestal or that you believe that you are better than others. You love yourself with humility and grace, not with conceit, arrogance or narcissism. It's the way you treat yourself and how you take care of yourself, and when you love yourself well, you show up differently in the world.

Michelle Hall: 3:27

Should we cultivate self-love or is it selfish? It is a resounding yes for me. We should definitely cultivate self-love, and no, it is not selfish. Loving yourself first is important because it is the foundation for loving others. In the Bible, the second command that Jesus gave was to love thy neighbor as thyself. A lot of people think different things about this scripture. I happen to believe that we need to love ourselves well so that we can love others well. That is what we are called to do and that we cannot love others beyond the extent that we love ourselves.

Michelle Hall: 4:11

As a survivor of CSA, it is important that you develop strong self-love, because you often feel unlovable as a result of the trauma that you experienced. You may feel unworthy or that you're not enough, and with those beliefs, you look for love from other people or from things. That means you may get into relationships that are not good for you, or you compromise, or you're mistreated, or you are disrespected. You may stay in such a relationship to keep people around you, keep people in your life, so you try to continue to get love from them. That is not how you want to exist in the world. That is not what I want for you and I hope that is not what you want for yourself.

Michelle Hall: 5:04

I was listening to a sermon by Dr Myles Munroe from several years ago I think it was 2004 that he recorded this message. I just love the messages from Dr Monroe. He was such a wonderful Bible teacher, such an intelligent man, and I listened to a lot of his stuff. But anyway, I was listening to a sermon that he talked about self-love and he was very clear about what self-love is and why you should cultivate it. But one very key thing that he said is that when you love yourself and I mean love yourself well, you're not as concerned about whether other people love you. If you don't love yourself and you are in situations where you're depending on others to love you, they can control you because they can take their love away and leave you an emotional mess because you no longer have love if you don't have self-love. So it's important to cultivate self-love. So when a relationship ends, you're okay because you love yourself. That is so important. You definitely want to cultivate self-love and get yourself to a place where you can rely on the love that you have for yourself and the love that God has for you to get you through and not depend so much on people or things to feel love.

Michelle Hall: 6:41

When I was a teenager and a young woman, I hate to admit, but I did not love myself well. If someone had asked me during that time of my life, do you love yourself? I would have said yes, of course I do. But the truth of the matter is, when you look at the meaning of self-love as I have described it earlier in the show, I did not love myself well. I wanted to be loved. I wasn't focused on myself. I was focusing on receiving love from others.

Michelle Hall: 7:17

You see, I grew up fatherless as well as being sexually abused as a kid, so I had a double whammy. But being a fatherless child left a huge void in my life. I felt like I was truly, truly missing out on the experience of having a father in my life to love me, to nurture me and teach me what I needed to know to go into the world confident and self-assured. I was raised by my mother, as she was president in my life, but I just had a very deep and huge void that I had from not knowing who my father was. In essence, I had a gaping father wound.

Michelle Hall: 8:02

I got married at 21 years old to a man whom I loved. He was my first love and I loved him the best that I knew how. But before we actually married, he left me on our wedding day and I was devastated. But I married him two days later after he left me almost literally at the altar. Who does that? Well, I did because I wanted to be loved. My father wound was so prevalent in my life and I also had low self-esteem from the sexual abuse and some other childhood hardships that I had experienced. I went into the marriage with the primary goal of making my husband happy so that he would continue to love me. That was my premise for marriage. I had not seen marriages in my life as a child because pretty much every adult around me was single, so I had no education on what a marriage should be. Well, it didn't take me very long to realize that making my husband happy as a sole premise for marriage is not what marriage was all about. It is imperative that we heal our trauma and cultivate self-love to avoid making decisions out of desperation.

Michelle Hall: 9:34

Introducing The Esteemed Shop, where confidence meets style. Elevate your wardrobe with our inspirational t-shirts, start your day with positivity and spread love with our unique collection. At The Esteemed Shop, we believe in celebrating the power of self-love. And here's something special just for you. Use code BLACKHISTORY10 for an exclusive 10% off your entire cart until February 29, 2024, in honor of Black History Month. Visit the esteemedshop. com now and embrace your greatness, because empowerment knows no bounds. So I've been talking about for the last few episodes my new signature personal development program that I am launching and I am happy, happy, happy to announce that the program is open and ready for enrollment. It is a 12-week group program for women survivors to cultivate more self-love and it's called the Self-Love Expedition. It is both practical and biblical because it is based on my healing journey and my journey included both biblical both the biblical and practical.

Michelle Hall: 10:52

I have shared on the podcast many times that I went to counseling for support during my healing journey and I have no shame in seeking practical mental health support. I think more people should do it. It was very helpful and very pivotal in my healing process, but it was not just counseling that helped me. As a believer and follower of Jesus Christ, I strengthened my faith in Christ. I relied heavily on God to help me through the process and to show me the lessons that I needed to learn. As I was going through and healing from the abuse, from the void of fatherlessness that I had and other things that I had been dealing with, and as I began to cultivate more love for myself, things began to shift in my life.

Michelle Hall: 11:50

I want to clearly say that I am not a licensed counselor and that I am not a trauma coach. I am a trauma-informed coach, which means I've had some background study on how trauma affects us as children and into adulthood. I am a certified Christian life coach and I say that to say that you may need other support in addition to this program, depending on where you are in life and your healing journey. That is not unusual. I do address the effects of trauma and reframing limiting beliefs in the program, but this is a self-love program where the focus is on the aspects I talked about earlier of self-esteem, self-worth, self-discovery, self-care and self-compassion to cultivate a well-rounded and robust love for yourself. It is about getting more confidence in yourself and solidifying your worth and value in Christ. It's also about building your esteem to where you can stand up straight, bold and strong, to be able to make decisions that you haven't been able to make before and not be so concerned about what other people think or feel about you. What's important is what you think about you, and this program is all about that.

Michelle Hall: 13:26

So if you are struggling with a lack of self-worth and a negative self-image, or if you're still battling the emotional aftermath of childhood abuse and trauma, or feeling isolated and looking for a community of like-minded women, or perhaps you're dealing with anxiety, self-doubt and a constant sense of unworthiness, I have a transformative journey where you can reclaim your true identity, your power and your voice. You will gain a deeper connection with God's love as a source of inner strength. You will get tools to navigate and heal from past traumas, and you will get a safe and supportive community of like-minded women. You will gain increased self-esteem, self-worth and self-compassion. You will discover more about yourself and who you are at your core, your mindset will be transformed and your confidence will radiate God's love in all areas of your life.

Michelle Hall: 14:31

If this sounds like something that you want in your life, I invite you to apply for the self-love expedition. The application process is to ensure that I get the right women in the room, because this program is not for everyone. If you're interested in the program but don't want to be in a group setting. I can accommodate that as well. Complete the same application and indicate your preference for one-to-one in the last question box. Because this is the inaugural program or the beta version. Spots for both the group and the one-on-one is very limited. The group program is limited to eight women and the one-to-one service is limited to four. Enrollment is open through February 25th.

Michelle Hall: 15:24

This program is for you if you are seeking healing from childhood abuse and trauma, if you desire a deeper connection with God and the journey of self-love, if you are committed to personal growth and empowerment, if you are ready to embrace worthiness in the eyes of God and if you are seeking a supportive community of like-minded women who've been through something similar to what you've been through. This program is not for you if you are not ready to explore the spiritual aspects of healing, if you are unwilling to engage in a supportive group environment, (you can consider the one-to-one option). It's not for you if you are seeking a quick fix without the commitment to personal growth. It's not for you if you are resistant to exploring your past experiences and emotions and if you are not open to integrating Biblical principles into your self-flow of journey. I designed this program to be everything that I needed and didn't have when I was going through my healing journey. I want the process to be streamlined so that you don't have to go through it alone and that you can get results faster with an intentional program and framework that leads you through the steps that you need to take to develop radical self-love and confidence. If this program is for you, I hope to see your application come through very soon. The link to the application is in the show notes.

Michelle Hall: 17:06

Healing is possible and life can get better. You just have to do the work. Until next time. Thank you for joining me on this episode of Broken to Blessed. Subscribe to the podcast and share it with all of your sister girlfriends. This podcast may be the catalyst to their healing journey. And remember life can get better. You just have to do the work. God bless.