From Invisibility to Presence: Reclaiming Your Narrative

As we step into Women's History Month, I, Michelle Hall, embrace the raw and poignant stories that have sculpted our identities as women. With 'Broken to Blessed', we honor the magnitude of women's achievements and confront the sobering reality of childhood sexual abuse—a reality I know all too well. This episode is a tapestry of celebration and vulnerability, threading the powerful contributions of women in history with the personal narratives that often remain hidden. Through my lens as a Christian life coach and survivor, I offer a candid exploration of the evolving landscape of gender roles and the often challenging dance between society's expectations and the pursuit of self-empowerment.

Emboldening women to step out of the shadows and into the light of visibility, I extend a heartfelt invitation to our Journey to Freedom program. It's a sanctuary for growth and healing where women can foster a deeper sense of self and emerge as the authors of their own stories. My message is one of hope and transformation, urging listeners to pass along this episode as a beacon of support. Together, we traverse the intricate journey from feeling unseen to a place of presence and recognition. Join us, and be part of a collective movement that champions the voices of women and the sacredness of our shared experiences.

Survivors' Ball

Survivor's Declaration

The EsteemedShop Inspirational and Faith-based t-shirts and other merchandise

#WearBlueDay2024
#SAAM2024

https://livetheesteemedlife.com/

My Facebook Page

IG https://www.instagram.com/livetheesteemedlife/

Facebook Group The Esteemed Ones

Michelle@livetheesteemedlife.com

Journey to Freedom Questionnaire

Chapters

• 0:01 Visible Women
• 12:53 Empowering Women Through Self-Discovery

Transcript

Michelle Hall: 0:01

It's March and that means it's Women's History Month. I'm talking today about some advances that women have made over the past several years and how, even though we've made advancements, women still struggle with things such as feeling unseen or invisible. Stay tuned as I talk about some things that could indicate that you're feeling invisible or unseen and a very special announcement that I have at the end. Stay tuned. I'm Michelle Hall, a Christian life coach and the host of Broken to Blessed, a podcast designed for women survivors of childhood sexual abuse, where the goal is to empower, encourage and inspire women survivors who are on their healing journey to keep on going. Healing is possible. I know that to be true because I'm a survivor and I've done it, and I'm here to help you do the same. Hello, esteemed ones, this is the first week of March, which means Women's History Month has begun. I must say that I am proud to be not only a woman, but a woman of color in the United States in this time in history. I don't know why God chose to put me here during this time, but I'm here for it and for the purpose that he has for me. I want to give a shout out to women, past and present who have made significant contributions to the advancement of women. Women have a rich history in this country and have endured a lot and fought hard over the years to help gain the great strides towards equality, and I want to recognize that and show my gratitude for the sacrifices of so many that paved the way for me to be here where I am today. Women also have, unfortunately, a rich history of sexual abuse. April is sexual assault awareness month and I will definitely do some feature work in April that's more in-depth and detailed about sexual assault. Women have endured quite a bit of sexual abuse as children and women, and that also plays a part in women's history. I want to recognize that also because when a woman experiences sexual abuse, it does not in there. There are residual effects after the trauma occurs, such as the feelings of shame, guilt, anger, anxiety, worthlessness and many others. These things become a part of life that affects a woman throughout her life until she gets help to change it. One of the biggest things that women struggle with is the feeling of not being seen or invisibility, despite the education and the ability to earn well in the workplace and all the advances that women have made. This is a very real struggle. Many women who are killing the game in the workplace are struggling on the inside with feeling unseen and invisible. So that's what I want to talk about today. Women are very freely able to get education now. I don't know the statistics, but more women are probably receiving degrees now than men are, and women now have the ability to earn well maybe not equal to men yet, but we can earn better than we ever have been able to in the past. Those are great strides and those are things that should be recognized.

Michelle Hall: 3:44

I'm going to talk real quick about some of the conversations that are going on as it relates to women becoming more educated, more independent and less feminine. In air quotes, I listen to a lot of podcasts and YouTube shows and there is a lot of debate on the gender roles between men and women, and I hear a lot of men mainly young men Talking about women who earn well and take care of themselves, are too independent or too masculine and they would love to see more feminine or traditional women like their grandmothers in the dating and relationship arena. And then I hear young women talking about how men are not as masculine as their grandfathers and they're not providers for the family and, as a result, women don't want the traditional gender roles of cooking and cleaning and doing everything themselves for the house because they go to work too. Women are looking more for partnership and non-traditional roles. Personally, I think the gender roles of old are long gone for the most part. Clearly I'm biased. Clearly I'm biased, but working women should not shoulder the majority of household responsibilities. We want some help. This is an indication of the advancement that women have made with education, job skills and the ability to earn their own money and not have to rely on men as much as women did in the past. Things have shifted and I don't necessarily think that's a bad thing, but hey, that's another conversation for another day.

Michelle Hall: 5:30

What I want to focus on today is that, even though women have made great strides in equality, education and income, one of their biggest struggles is feeling unseen or invisible. Women are still naturally wired to serve, nurture and do for others more so than they do for themselves. Women often have a deep capacity to see the invisible meaning, the ability to hear what is not being spoken and the capacity to discern that which has never been made known before. We have an exceptional ability to help others because of our highly developed capacity for insight, empathy, perception and discernment, and with that we sometimes find ourselves feeling disconnected from our own feelings, needs and desires and doing selfless acts of service. It's not uncommon for women to put others before themselves. I think that's just how we're naturally wired. That's the way God made us, and with the shift of these traditional roles it can become difficult to manage all of those things if we don't have proper balance.

Michelle Hall: 6:46

So I'm going to ask four things, and if any of these resonate with you, then perhaps you are struggling with invisibility or not being seen in your life. Number one do you disappear when you don't get your needs met rather than asked directly for what you want? Number two do you engage in selfless acts to the point of exhaustion and depletion, rarely making your own needs and desires known? Number three Do you create relationships where only one person gets to be fully seen, requiring the other, ie you, to overlook your needs and desires almost entirely? And number four Do you become hurt and resentful when others don't automatically see your unexpressed needs and desires in the way you can see the needs of others? If any of those resonated with you, you may have a limiting belief that you only exist to serve others or that others don't care about you or others are selfish.

Michelle Hall: 8:01

There is one main skill that you can learn and incorporate into your life to help you overcome that invisibility, and that is the skill of presencing yourself, which is simply generating your own visibility of your thoughts, your feelings, ideas and vision. And that is indeed a skill that can be learned and put into practice, and it can turn things around, because who wants to wait for someone to see them or to acknowledge them? You have the ability to present yourself and to make yourself seen. And now look, I'm an introvert. I don't like to put myself out there. You know I'm doing a podcast and I'm a coach and I'm getting ready to talk about an event that I'm doing just for you all, but I don't like to put myself out there. However, to have the impact on the women that God has set for me to serve, I have to presence myself and put myself out there so that I can do the work that he has for me to do. So, if you are an introvert, trust me, I understand. It's a skill that has to be developed. When I first started this podcast, I would not even listen back to the recording once I published the episode, that's how bad I was. So this is an important skill to develop because it helps you in your life. It helps you with your relationships, your relationship with others and with yourself. It'll help you advance in your career. It's a good skill to put into action so that you are not just on the sidelines waiting for someone else to recognize your greatness or to read your mind regarding your needs and desires. Make yourself known, make yourself visible and put yourself out there.

Michelle Hall: 10:02

And speaking of that, I want to tell you all about an exciting event my first ever virtual event for women survivors of childhood sexual abuse. I am so excited, y'all so excited, because it's an opportunity for you to presence yourself. It is the survivor's ball, the first annual survivor's ball, because this is something that I want to do each and every year to celebrate women survivors of childhood sexual abuse, not just childhood sexual abuse, but any type of sexual abuse, because it doesn't get the recognition that it should, and I want to make that situation more visible. And I know that there are so many women out there who have experienced sexual assault, sexual abuse, and they are suffering in silence or they have sought help, but they're not fully where they need to be. Like I was saying earlier, there are ripple effects. There are ripple effects of sexual abuse that can last long after the assault occurs. So I am doing this event to honor the spirit, the perseverance and the resilience of the women who have experienced sexual abuse in their lives.

Michelle Hall: 11:22

It's a ball and it's going to be a ball. So it's a party. It's gonna be a virtual party and it's gonna be a celebration. I want the ladies to dress up. It's a ball and I'm gonna be in my formal gown. You can put on your ball gown if you want, or you can put on your best outfit, whatever it is you wanna do. We're gonna have dynamic speakers that's going to speak life into you. We have entertainment, a spoken word artist who's going to bring forth a wonderful word. There's going to be a virtual fashion show. If you like to show off your clothes, if you like to model, you wanna do a virtual runway, this is the event for you. You can sign up for the virtual fashion show once you make your registration for the event. I'm going to put the link to the website for the ball and the show notes. It's gonna be a lot of fun.

Michelle Hall: 12:17

It is on April 27th from six to nine PM, and I am so looking forward to it. I'm excited about this, as it is the first event of this type that I have ever done, and I wanna do it for you, and I want you to take the time to celebrate yourself and put yourself first, even if it's just for those few hours. Take time out to presence yourself. Join us for the fun, for music, for dancing and inspirational speakers. Check out the link to the Savara's Ball website in the show notes for more information.

Michelle Hall: 12:53

And if you are struggling with invisibility, I invite you to check out the Journey to Freedom program that is designed to help women identify and build the skills they need, not only to make themselves present and visible, but to help them go deeper in self-discovery and learn how to put themselves first so they can serve others from a healthy and whole place, without sacrificing their mental wellbeing. The link for that program is also in the show notes. Okay, until next time. Thank you for joining me on this episode of Broken to Blessed. Subscribe to the podcast and share it with all of your sister girlfriends. This podcast may be the catalyst to their healing journey. And remember life can get better. You just have to do the work. God bless.